I am a fighter.

The whole point of this blog was to help other women on their path to finding out who they are and being the best ____(fill in your name here)____ that you can be.

The Buddha got me sidetracked.

It's not a blog to say women are soooooo much better then men or to say I can live without them or anything like that; I'm not a man-basher.  Women and men (when paired right) compliment each other; they are a team.  'Divide and conquer', 'It takes two', 'Let's get together', 'I love you, you love me', 'Good cop, bad cop'.  It wasn't just Adam in the Garden...it wasn't just Eve.  It was Adam and Eve.  That being said, let me just say that sometimes I think we have to set ourselves away from the opposite sex in order to grow and be the best ____(fill in what you want to be here)___ that you can be.  That's where I am right now.  As much as I don't like it, there is wisdom in this moratorium.  During this alone time with myself, I have grown, stretched, torn, broken, healed, endured well, endured badly, won, lost, achieved, triumphed, bruised, bled, scarred, loved, hated, laughed, wept, and wept some more.  

I'm tired.

So, go ahead and ask me what I've gained from this.

"Hey, Esther, what have you gained from this?"

Excellent question...thank you for asking!

I have listed a few items of which I have gained and put in bullet form:

• Bob Marley can help with algebra.  The man has a serious ability to calm the savage beast and make everything O.K.  Not sure if it's the second-hand pot smoke, but whatever makes Bob Marley work his magic, I'm not going to question it.
• There are 3 things in life you cannot avoid: death, taxes, and gravity. 
• No matter what other people might say or think, the only opinion that really matters is the cat's.  You don't have to be an animal lover to appreciate when a cat comes up and rubs up against your leg to signify acceptance.  When our cat Snake jumps up on my bed to lay down, I feel as if I have arrived to some special status.  When that happens, I don't ask why...I take it and run.
• Chocolate can heal broken legs.  Well...I have yet to test this one, but my hypothesis is that...in large doses...chocolate can act as osteoblasts and repair damaged bones.  I'm still waiting for approval on this study.
• The Rock is, by far, the most beautiful human being that has ever lived, is living, or will ever live.
• You don't have to be drunk to have a hangover.  There are many types of hangovers.  The 'cry-yourself-to-sleep' hangover or the 'study-until-4 o'clock-in-the-morning-and-have-to-wake-up-at-6 o'clock' hangover.  There is also the 'wake-up-just-a-little-early-so-decided-to-go-back-to-sleep-for-10 minutes-but-slept-too-long-and-now-you-are-rushing-around-trying-to-get-your-bag-together-or-you'll-be-late' hangover.  Just to name a few.

There are so many other things that I've learned, but those illustrate the most important points.  I'll summarize by saying that I would never say that I've absolutely LOVED the journey.  There were (are) times in which I want to pack it all up...sell the house...and buy a Harley for the cat and me; however, I look in the mirror with reflection (no pun intended), and realize that this journey has helped make me who I am today.  Every step I take uphill makes me stronger.  Every barrier overcome increases my desire to overcome even more barriers.  Confidence explodes and self-worth increases exponentially.  It makes me wonder how high the ceiling is on this growth.  I plan on maxing out.