That would make a great book title if it isn't already.
My dishwasher isn't working, so I've been washing my dishes the "old-fashioned" way...by hand. I actually don't mind it, really...although it has given me some time to think...
...and that's dangerous.
I can be totally honest about a great deal of my flaws and one of them is that I tend to generalize. This isn't a good thing, really, because you can't just place a set of characteristics on, say, gender, to cover that one gender. Why do I pick out gender? Easy.
Because I'm sexist.
Not in the "all-men-are-pigs" way, but in the "all-men-_(fill-in-the-blank)_" way. Maybe this wouldn't be considered to be sexist to some, but I do just because it's using an essentialist type of thinking toward men...that men are a certain way and women are a certain way...and that is how it is.
I'm trying to reform.
Anyhow...as I was washing the dishes, in my angry mood, and I caught myself thinking about the men I've dated...as I sometimes do...and I was trying to lump them all (4 of them) in the same category, which was unfair, but I couldn't help but wonder what it is about me that seems to repel or scare or ward or deter myself from any type of relationship. Don't get me wrong, I'm not blaming myself nor do I feel as if I have to 'change' for someone...if that's the case, I WILL end up being alone for the rest of my life because that WILL NOT happen. I like who I am and who I am aiming to be. What I'm saying, is that I wonder what type of guy would be attracted to a woman like me...a modern woman...who would rather bring home the bacon than fry it up in a pan. A soft, sensitive type...who does windows and would stay home with the kids? A "go...get 'em" type that would need to keep up with me? A laid back kind who could even me out?
Whoever it is...I'm not sure that he's ready. I'm quite a handful.
2 comments:
hahahahaha! You are a handful! But the very best kind of handful. The kind that makes people think and never settles for less than what she wants. I have my guesses as to who will best compliment you, but I'm usually surprised by the people that end up together.
I'm sorry about your dishwasher. Do you know what's wrong with it?
I prefer to wash my dishes by hand. I just hate drying them.
I'm the opposite. I was driving to work this morning, thinking (about things that I can not put on the web...) that I wouldn't mind if some guy decided that he was ready to take me on and set me up in a house where I could cook and clean his bacon all day long. Wait, what?
Of course, I was told recently -- by myself and others -- that I am the most sexist person they've ever met.
What can I say?
It's sort of true.
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